Enough With the Dragons
by evilolive
- Published:October 29th, 2008
- Comments:2 Comments
- Category:Fan Fiction
It is a little disconcerting how much Eragon fanfiction there is, considering that the book itself is a horrific pastiche of Star Wars and Lord of the Rings. Is fanfiction based on this series even necessary?
A Fallen Shadow Ascends
Eragon stared. Murtagh was no longer the boy he had travelled to the Varden with, who he had fought a variety of creatures with, whose companionship he had cherished in times of great need. The man who he had duelled with, and lost to, on the Burning Plains had grown ever stronger and greater.
“Murtagh, you cannot be my brother.”
He laughed, not a cackle like Galbatorix, but a deep, rich and wholesome laugh.
“What, Rider? Am I not good enough to be of your blood?”
Eragon sighed, shrinking into the corner.
“You’re never too good for me.” he blurted out, his eyes on Murtagh’s impressive bulge in his trousers.
Murtagh raised his eyebrows. “Eyes up here. I have orders for you. The king requested you in his room. We’re leaving, brother.”
I shot out of bed and landed on the carpeted floor. ‘Wow, what a nightmare’.
I snatched a glance at the digital alarm clock. 4:30 a.m., it read. Feeling thirsty, I began walking to the kitchen. But before that, I am Danny. Daniel Phoenix to be exact. However, I never knew that I would be going on a strange journey. Anyway, I walked down the stairs and grabbed a mug from the counter. I placed the mug under the dispenser and filled it up halfway. After a big gulp, I placed it back on the counter, too lazy to wash it. Vlad will clean it in the morning anyway. One word though, I’m an only child and my father is a thermonuclear physicist (whatever the heck that means), working in a top-secret government facility while my mother runs Promedia Inc., a company that deals with artists, movies, that kind of stuff.
2 Comments
I tried to read Eragon. I didn’t finish the first chapter–too Stuey. I thought it was the most terrible writing I’d ever read. But this?
“I began walking to the kitchen. But before that, I am Danny.”
WORSE.
See, at first I thought the first one was slash fiction involving Roger Murtagh from Lethal Weapon. Because he’s getting too old for this shit.